Porn-E-Oke by the Bay

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Eleven PM. Hunters Point. It's pitch black. Eerie silence fills the air as I walk the down the path to the point at  Heron's Head Park, India Basin- a reclaimed wetland area in a dilapidated part of the city. For the intrepid the sojourn brought a night of uncensored fun. Our host, KJ Paul, the Grandfather of Porn-E-Oke, took us a trek to the tip of a peninsula where the overwhelming sound of silence always drowns out the screams of... well, whatever.

Path to Heron's Head Point.

The weather was typical for a late July evening: Fifty five degrees, westerly winds of eight to ten miles per hour, humidity hovering at around ninety-five percent, and no worries for the hearty. Paul, John, Becca, George, Scott, Melissa, Camille, Rob, and I had made the trek out to the Point to get our Porn karaoke on. Screw last call! screw The Man! We all had come to sing out loud and no m@therf#cker was going to tell us when to stop! Paul's portable flash-mob-karaoke-show-in-a-baby-stroller is a thing of beauty: Two car batteries provide reliable power for up to eleven hours of karaoke bliss. 

KJ Paul

Who's singing Island Girl? Why, no other than Scott and George. There are so many songs that marry so well with Porn-E-Oke, and as the photos shows, this song is one of the best.

And that was only one of many songs dedicated to the love of porn and percussion. Nobody stripped down to their birthday suits that evening but it was just as well. Stage fright (think shrinkage) usually prevails.

Here are some more photos of the night.

What's so damn funny, Paul?

Melissa exposes some skin.

John looks on as Becca revives George from his marathon porn session with Scott.

There's porn goin' on out there!

 History was made that night. A precedent set. No other Porn karaoke on the planet has ever taken place at night in a wetland preserve adjacent to a power plant, a shipyard, and a barrio. To be there singing to the Seals and Herons and ghost ships was an experience to remember. Porn will never be viewed or sung about in the same way, again.

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My First Karaoke Gig

Thursday, July 1, 2010

The first time doing something new is usually a nerve-wracking experience. Such was my first night working hosting Karaoke. It was nerve-wracking, scary, exciting, and also, way fun!

My debut happened last night at Celestine's Fine Dining, in Oakland. My mentor, Glenny Kravitz, would guide me through the intricacies of running a karaoke show from start to finish. Since this was only the second Thursday night of the Kravitz era at Celestine's, we thought it would be a slow night and I would have plenty of time to learn how to set-up our gear, engineer the sound system, and manage the song queue with the karaoke software. It would be a smooth evening, right? Fail! Not two minutes into our show did a group of 15 people walk through the door ready to sing. So much for the easy night Ash Wednesday, now it is a trial by fire! Ten more people arrived five minutes later and away we went with a full list of singers. Add to that it was the owner's birthday! Add ten more people and soon it was a big party.

Mostly I handled the queue while Glenny showed me how to adjust the sound for each song. By now, my brain was on overdrive trying to absorb all the information funneling into my brain all at once. I made a few mistakes during the course of the evening, and Glenny let me make them, yet most of the time I was able to handle the pressure and keep everyone singing, and happy. San Francisco Karaoke Mafia member John Baker showed up with his crooning talent and worked the crowd into a dancing frenzy. All in all, it was a great evening hosting songs to a vibrant and fun crowd of people who love to have a good time. Thanks Glenny for all your help, and thanks to Celestine, for ushering in the newest karaoke club to Oakland.

So, if you live in the East Bay and are looking for a good place to sing karaoke on a Thursday evening, look no further than Celestine's Fine Dining. Cheers!